la de da

fucking gardiner
i am ready to go back to school. i wish i was there now but i still have another week here. everything about being home and in this town is driving me insane. it only took this long tobecause i was so distracted by working all summer to realize how boring and lonely and depressing gardiner is. also, the weather wasn't shitty before so there were things to do.

the only thing to do now is get drunk
or stoned and sit around
and go to wal*mart...

or maybe i'm just in a bad mood tonight and it's not gardiner's fault at all. i'm sure there are plenty of people who live here and are perfectly happy with it. i just dont happen to be one of them.

now its time for some chocolate ice cream.

Current Mood: hungry

Home
So... home in maine for almost a month now and I've managed to score a second job at a greenhouse that my boss's brother owns, which means I dont have to worry about conflicting shifts ever, and I can get them compete for my labor by asking for raises!! mwahaha. This does mean, however that I work basically every day of the week, unless I explicitly ask for a day off. But thats not bad so far. I usually work until the early afternoon at the greenhouse, then have the rest of the day to veg and do what I want. It might be more of a bummer if the weather was actually nice but its been raining so much lately that there's really nothing better to do than work.

In other news, I'm leaving monday for Missouri for a week to visit my Grandma. It's her birthday and we usually go visit at least once a year to see all of my mom's relatives.

I should get going now. I'm going to play with Doc. We all went out to dinner tonight but we forgot to let him in before we left, so he was stuck outside in the rain for 2.5 hours!

i hate my life
i just had my piano exam, at which i had to play the minor scales and major chord inversions. prof bonde, who is usually cheerful and happy was in a bad mood and when i was half way done he told me to stop and asked if i had a lot of other exams and papers to do? i said yeah and he said that he was disapointed because he thought i should have done better, and asked if i practiced. i said yes i did practice and i was probably just nervous. he laughed then told me to finish my chord inversions. i almost didnt finish because i was about to cry. when i was done he told me not to worry and that hes sure i'll go far in life... by this time i was actually crying but he had already changed the subject to his sabaticle so he thought i was crying because he was leaving so he gave me a big hug and told me to go walk around the lake.

I'm so impressed with my own producitivity lately!
Yesterday, met with my history prof about my final paper and got some good insights from her. Them Mel and I went to a coffee place in Amherst where I finished a book! Also, got my first slice at Antonio's- white pizza. very delish. Mel's was better though... i think it was like steak taco pizza or something.

Finals are close but they aren't looking unmanagable yet. 1 short assignment due next week for music, along with my piano scales exam, then the week after (last day of classes), my 5 page history final paper is due and a bio lab report. Then 2 dead days before finals. I do have 4 exams... which sucks but one of them is take home, and one of them is bio. I should only really worry about history and chem. But thats all far far away. I appologize for that mapping of my academic duties for the rest of the year... I'm really trying to avoid comparing my workload to other peoples, becuase it just turns into a sick form of bragging around here. But I suppose livejournal would be the place to do it if I were going to make a public to-do list.

ANyway... on a slightly more interesting note.. my sister is coming to visit this weekend! yayyy!

ahhh its sooo nice out today. just got out of lab and i'm about to go lie out on my roof or the green and read some malcolm x! woooo!

im going home this weekend for a little break from the moho scene. also, for easter i guess. anyone who is going to be home should give me a call.

what a dumb morning. i knocked a computer over in keyboard lab today. i was so tired while Bonde was talking that i leaned on the desk, but i leaned too much and everything came crashing down. he stopped class early not long after that and told us all to go take a walk around the lake and wake up. i would have gone for a walk but i have history reading and sandals on. oh well. i will go to the gym tonight. i'll pack my gym bag right now and take it wtih me to class... yeah.

the weather is so nice lately and it makes me miss the beach. i watched the princess bride last night and that made me miss love. some love and a beach would be great right now, but i suppose chem lab will have to do.

Current Mood: blah

ok here you go jennah
well so im updating . i hope you're all happy. i dont really have time to reestablish my livejournal addiction but i'm doing it anyway. HAh!

soo whats going on with me? hmmm well... 8 months goes by quickly!
went to senegal for 2 weeks in january with school.. mostly to practice my french but ended up practicing my smiling and nodding skills

decided that i either want to be an OBGYN, a midwife, or a concert pianist. or maybe something else. i dont know. dont ask me what iwant to do with my life. and dont ask me what my major is. and if you do, dont gawk when i say 'bio' and ask me if i'm pre-med. and if i do say i'm pre-med and you are too, dont get all giddy and try to talk to me about nucleotides, or our last chem quiz, or how long you studied for it. school and studying and homework and labs are wonderful but for god's sake, have a LIFE!

oh yeah and kyle and i broke up.. like in october. i didnt really feel like writing about it in livejournal then and i dont really want to now either. i just thought all of my livejournal pals should be updated.

on a lighter note... PROJECT RUNWAY is on tonight! can NOT wait to see fashion week! santino.. your ass is grass!

love,
rose

Current Mood: apathetic
Current Music: meg's singing

summer is going by sooo fast!

my parents went shopping with me to buy a new camera for my graduation present. It's a really nice one, and although its a little more bulky than i'd hoped it supposedly takes better pictures.

Went hiking with Kyle, Willy, Josh, Zack and Whit yesterday on Tumbledown mountain. THe trail was a lot um.. steeper. than i'd expected. Either that or I'm just really out of shape. Either way, the boys ran up the mountain leaving us girls in the dust. Eventually I got to the top though, and the awesome view was worth the excessive amounts of sweat I'd surrendered. There was a pretty lake on the top of the mountain and a couple of friendly college students let us use their water purifier to fill up. I definitley need to invest in some hiking boots before school starts, to be ready for my hiking class. Otherwise my ankles will hurt like this all the time!!

and now back to my lazy summer day.

well, hello again
so i havent written in a month so heres a quick update.

graudation was cool... i got a big music award and a couple of scholarships. Also, got to see both of my grandmas, my brotha from anotha motha, my auntie and my cousin. project grad was lame.

I'm still working at fullers, serving up the meat, with lots more hours than before. Still with kyle too, and things are good. On days off from work I've been frequenting the beach or jennahs house.

Last weekend I went on a canoe trip down the saco river with he and his friends, which was fun until we landed in mosquito heaven and got etaen alive. I also lost my sandals and got in 2318723 fights with kyle. oh well.

I wanted to plan a trip to germany this summer to visit my aunt, but thats not going to happen because she's busy and I should probably save my money for next year.

A week ago, however, my parents, my sister and I all went to mexico which was really cool. We did a lot of snorkeling and hiking and looking at stuff.. which was cool except for the hellacious heat.

Also, my classes are mostly figred out for next year. I got into a sweet hiking pe class and none of my clases start before 10am. wooo! I'm sure 10am will become early though, and 7am will become extinct.

School is done! Well, not technically. I still have one more marching practice before graduation... which I have to wake up before 7 for... hmm maybe i still have a few hurdles to jump before I'm done.

Today was class day and I won $700 in scholarships. I'm up to $800 with my drama club scholarship, not couting the essay contest a few weeks ago. woooo!!
and more scholarships to come at graduation!! bring on the mon-ayyy

finally turned in the baritone that i've been hoarding at my house all year. it was kind of sad giving it up, since i never really learned to play it but maybe i can mooch off the music department at my college.

Whoa! It's friday again!!

besides a couple of little health problems and some sucky tests at school, things are good. i'm finding that somehow, i still care about my grades even though it doesnt matter at all anymore. MAybe im just paranoid that my school will reject me or something if they see i got a 76 in chem last quarter (which hopefuly i wont be..)

wed was my long awaited piano recital and it went well. having a few close family members and friends helped created a relaxed atmosphere and i played likea champ.

last night, kyle and I went to see star wars. caught up with willy, greg , noah, zack, nathaniel, whit and jared there. I actually stayed awake through all of it!! (this is quite a feat, since it ended long after my bedtime)

i must go to work now, though. bahhh

i dont even know. the past few days have been insane and surreal and draining, but im coming out of it, so ill provide a brief summary.

Wed-found out that my uncle Ron passed away.
thurs- english AP test

Fri-left for jazz band trip

Sat- came home, "partied" with willy, convinced kyle i could drive his car, drove through someones lawn. hahaha

mon- left for Ron's funeral in NYC. Sat outside with my cousin and talked while the wake was going on (rather than sit around and watch everyone cry). Then the funeral happened, and it was sad. The hardest part for me was watching people who i dont usually see sad, have to wipe away tears. I can't even handle it.
The hotel was in the upper east side, and the funeral was in harlem. We took a limo to the church.

well well
so, things are good. life in general is good.
so so so much on my mind at the moment but im managing.
first, there's school stuff:
last minute projects, AP tests, scholarships

then theres prom:
making my dress, getting a tux, hoping we wont get kicked out ;) making alternative plans in case we do get kicked out ( probably mcdonalds then the pool hall! )

then theres ceremonial shit
senior suppers, topp ten banquet, awards ceremonies, band concerts, piano recitals, guest lists, dress clothes, ahh!Q

then theres just life
..REALLY TRYING to exercise, trying not to blow ALL of my money, making summer plans, germany?!?

im definitley not comlaining though. the weather isfinaly taking a turn for the better which means i can spent lots and lots of time outside, and just take in the sun. things are falling into place and in general, my head feels clear. Next year i'm going to an awesome college and ill be close enough to partay with my Mass buddies!!!
<3

sunday. the last day of break,last day of relaxation before graduation. that is, unless senioritis sets in before that.

this is a very non-roseish thing to say, but i am SO SUPER PSYCED FOR PROM!! every year i've gone with friends, or not, and its been fun but this year im actually excited about all hte little details. Mom and I are making progress on my dress. its going to be extremely hot. Kyle and i looked at tuxes the other day and decided on a black one with a white vest and either a white tie or a gold one to match my dress. yayy!

This weekend is the long awaited green day concert and we are all making shirts that say the bands name on them. Its going to be a blast.

Right now, and for the past 2 days its been pouring out, which makes me sad ebcause it was so nice all week. Jen sent me some sweet beach pics that im going to try to post as soon as i figure out how...

so, school starts again in 3 days and I have a lot of work in front of me. both school work and regular work. I can't complain, though. Its been a good week and I did have one big accomplishment.. I finally decided on a school! Its going to be Mount Holyoke for me in the fall. After vising this weekend my mind was made up, and it feels soo good to finally know.

I got back monday afternoon from the college extravaganza then went out to see Anityville horror with kyle and jennah. Tuesday, he and I went to vaughn woods for a walk then got ice cream, and I worked 3-8. Wednesday, Jennah, Kyle, Whit and I went to popham but it was too cold for a beach day so we ended up walking aroudn fort popham. I worked again at 3, and later htat night hung out at kyles friends house. It was a bit of a party...

Thursday I spent the day recovering, napping, eating, and being useless then that night went over to willys for a while. We had big plans to watch the O.C. but his cable was disconnected so we watched Sea Lab episodes instead.

Today I plan on getting some homework done so this weekend doesnt BLOW, then work 3-6, and making some progress on my dress with mom. Kyle and I are going to prom, no matter what kempton says. We are going to sneak him in and its going to be AwESOME. (for anyone who doesnt know, my school admin decided that graduates from any hgh school but gardiner cannnot go to prom... which means kyle isnt allowed) rarrrr

AHH! exactly 5 weeks until graduation!!!AHH! my goals before school ends include surviving, not going crazy from cabin fever with this great weather, getting my work done (sort of) and applying for some scholarships

your MOM goes to college...
so its been a bit of a while since i wrote last. things are good. got in at mount holyoke and clark. no tufts or wellesley but thats okay. ive narrowed my choices to mount holyoke or u-vermont. hopefully a visit to both next weekend will help me decide.

school's winding down.something like 7 more weeks left? maybe? i dont know. pizazz is over too. pete and i were emcees which was a lot of fun.

i really really need to start working out. im starting to feel the effects of overeating ad being lazy. being a fatty can put a person in a bad mood abouteverything.

things are still good with kyle. im going to bring him to prom, even if we have to smuggle him in. found a $20 tux at goodwill which was in good shape but when i went back to buy it today someone already got it.damnit!!

but my eyes are shutting now so i think its time for sleep. gnight

small envelopes
I never wanted to go to wellesley anyway...

plus, now I have one less tough decision to make.

maybe i should just go to music school

im lovely, thank you
So I spent the weekedn at sunday river with jules and her fam. the weather was great, conditions were 'mint' and it was just alltogether funalicious. The weekend did start off a bit rocky, when, in packing in a hurry, i took a bite of chicken then began to choke on it!! aHH!! Ok, so i wasn't literally choking. It wasnt in my breathing hole, but in my swallowing hole...
So anyway, her dad got there and i was like trying to get this chicken to budge out of my throat and it was all very awkward, so he got my equipment and said they come back in a few min. Luckily, though after swallowing a lot of yucky vommit inducing liquids, the chicken became dislodged and i was able to go on my way.

Just got the mail from the weekend and i got an $8000 scholarship to uvm! that puts a nice dent into the outrageous out of state tuition. Still hvae to hear from other schools before i decide for sure, but they seem to want me there. heh.

bring the noise!!!
So tonight was the last game ill ever have to play in with the pep band. the boys bball team lost to oxford, so no more crazy trips to bangor for our band! tonight was crazy indeed. we stopped at this all you can eat buffet and i ate soo much. almost died of.... food or someting. it was fun though.

Had another fucked up dream the other night. I was in a like, war zone, and there were bodies chopped up all over the streets! Then, all of a sudden I was at work and this guy was shooting all of my friends! AHhhh!

So I'm definitley in at UVM. Checked my admission status online tonight. It feels so good to have choices. yayy! (still dont know about other schools though, so i wont know where im going til i hear)

Had a heart to heart with walker on the bus ride up to the game. He said that I have a 'bad attitude' lately (which is true) and basically, that ineed to stop. I guess hes right... I have been kind of aweful lately to people.. but how do you stop being a bitch anyway? Its kind of unstoppable once you unleash it. its like heroine. I'm just keepin it real bitches! I can't be expected to be fake nice around people who annoy me. But at the same time, there really isnt any reason for me to be in a bad mood. Lots of underclassmen in the band and chorus look up to me and none of them have done anything to deserve the wrath of my bitchy moods.

Graduation is wayyyyy overdue!

Im bummed this weekend because of this crazy storm thats taking over and ruining my plans! People are talking about 2 more feet over 2 days. I dont know if i believe that.. but its definitley snowing, and i might not be able to go to UMF. grrrr

news
well,
amber's home and kyle is sick. thats about all hte news. that means that this weekend is a test for my social life... to see if i still have one that is. even if i don't though. im fine with sitting home and watching a movie with family memebers tonight.

Tonight we went to the liberal cup and i ate a liberal burger.

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